What is the unforgivable sin and did I commit it

Here is the answer before the explanation, because you need it first: no. The very worry that you might have committed the unforgivable sin is strong evidence that you have not. Take it slowly.

Jesus spoke of one sin that will not be forgiven: “the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost” (Matthew 12:31). Read the scene and notice what it was. People watched the Spirit’s work right in front of them — mercy, healing, deliverance — and called it evil, deliberately, finally, with their eyes open. It was not a word said in fear, not a doubt muttered at two in the morning, not an angry season of unbelief. It was settled, willful darkness calling itself light. The person who commits it is not tormented by the question of whether they have. The question cannot live in that soil. It is living in yours.

Every other sin — all of them — is forgivable, and the ledger is not close. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). All. The fear you carried in here is not a verdict; it is a conscience that still leans toward God, which is the opposite of the thing you dread. “Him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out” (John 6:37). Come. You are already most of the way.